A Spoonful of Common Sense

My oldest daughter is about to have her first baby. She is, as we all were, nervous about the parenting challenges that lie ahead. I told her that it is a waste of her energy to worry about the teen years before the teething years. Every child is as different as is every parent who walks miles through the parenting maze. I have often chastised my own mother for not warning me that this job doesn't end once your child blows out 18 candles on their birthday cake. But I have learned it is the one job that you never retire from and rarely live long enough to see the fruit of your labor.

I read many of the mommy blogs to see how the new generation views discipline. I would like to offer a dose of common sense. Here are five basic lessons every child should learn.

#5 Good manners - please and thank you are always appreciated but thank you cards should be sent to those who give a gift, do a kindness, for a teacher or a friend. It is an art that has gone by the way side but makes a huge difference, now and as an adult habit.

#4 Responsibility - no matter how young, children should learn to clean up after themselves. If they take it out, help them to pick it up when they are done. Oh, and set the example...pick up after yourself.

#3 Read! - This is a difficult lesson, but reading is obviously something your child will use for the rest of their lives, even it is as simple as reading directions. Keep it simple and let your child take the lead as to how much they want to read but one day a month (at least) should be a trip to the library. Reading to your child paves the way - and they are never too young!

#2 Tolerance - We are all different and the sooner these differences are seen as points of celebration rather than ridicule the better. Use positive words these differences whether they are of color, religion or disabilities. Be profound in your own behavior toward others.

#1 Kindness - To me this is the same as the "Golden Rule". Treat others as you wish to be treated. Sure it doesn't always work out that way, but for the most part if you smile or offer a kind word to someone, it will come back to you ten fold.

The most common sense approach I have for young parents, is to examine yourself. Buffalo Springfield said it best "Teach Your Children Well". Children imitate what they see and hear. Listen to what you say. Watch what you do. Then listen and watch them - children are a mirror.

I wrote this blog post while participating in the TwitterMoms and Nanny McPhee Returns blogging program, making me eligible to get a $50 gift card. For more information on how you can participate, click here. I decided to blog because being a grandma coming up on 6 times now, I am eligible for a t-shirt in common sense! That is what a wise grandma would do.

With A Little Help From My Friends

HELP! I need somebody! For those old enough to know the words, this Beatles song sang a familiar tune this past weekend. Teaching summer camps the past couple of months has left little time to work in the yard and the weeds had taken most of the yard hostage. Childhood friends and sisters, Sharon and Carol heard the call and came to the rescue.

My biggest problem was the pond. The pump had given out again - the third pump in the past 10 years. The pond was over run with iris that had gone wild, no blooms due to the shady area. The 5 gallon pots were too heavy to lift out of the pond by myself and the roots from the iris had embedded themselves deep into the silt and debris.

Cavalry to the rescue! The three of us spent the day clearing the pond, installing a new pump and filter, digging out old and setting in new fence posts. I had done much of the clearing of blackberries, morning glories and dandelions prior to their visit, so I can at last enjoy the last few weeks of summer in my beautiful yard.

With a little more than a quarter of an acre, it is always a challenge to keep it under control. I am forever grateful for good friends who not only know the words to the Beatles tune, but know exactly what they mean. I am having breakfast - french toast made with eggs from my chickens and topped with blueberries from my garden and humming my favorite tune. That's what a wise grandma would do.

My mother-in-law was a waitress for most of her working years and for all the stories she tells, I think she could write a book. Candacy A. Taylor has done just that in her book Counter Culture The American Coffee Shop Waitress.

Taylor, at age 30, was once a waitress in a sushi restaurant in San Francisco while working her way through graduate school. She remembers sitting around the back table, doing paperwork, counting out tips and sharing the grievances of the day with co-workers. She wondered how women twenty years older could handle the workload when Taylor herself worked half the hours and was tired and aching at the end of her shift.

Thus began a journey of twenty-six thousand miles across the United States to find diners and waitresses that fit the parameters of the project. Armed with digital camera, mini-recorder, maps and a scanner she interviewed fifty-nine waitresses in forty-three cities. Having been a waitress for over a decade she found herself able to speak the diner language.

Candacy Taylor tells the story of “Lifers” referring to the aging diner waitress. The chapter Ketchup in Her Veins, shows these resilient women walk, reach, lift, write, pour, wipe, socialize, bend over, pick up, memorize tedious details, argue with the cook and walk some more, making this career a true art form.

The chapter Tricks of the Trade focuses on veteran waitresses like seventy year old Rachel DeCarlo at Sittons North Hollywood Diner, California. “It’s like watching Fred Astaire dancing. She makes it look effortless,” says Karesse Klein a middle-aged waitress who worked with Rachel. How to carry several plates without the bottom of the plate touching the food, memorizing “the usual” for some two hundred customers a day and pleasing the difficult customer makes the veteran waitress a bit of a baby sitter and an actress changing roles from table to table.

Taylor dispels the waitress stigma of Flo telling customers to “kiss my grits” or a cigarette hanging out of her mouth that has fueled the stereotype of the diner or counter waitress. They have raised their children, put them through college, have nice homes and cars, all on the wage of a waitress. Most of them are divorced, single women, well educated but find they made better money waiting tables.

The history of women in diners in Counter Culture, details the strength, hard work and resolve of these aging women through the years. Despite long hours, heavy lifting and customer insults for up to 80 years these resilient women are among the healthiest, most vibrant and hardest-working women in the country.

The soft bound book is published by ILR/Cornell University Press and retail price is $19.95 and well worth the read. That's what a wise grandma would do.

A Stitch In Time

So many of the old crafts we used to do as children are disappearing or left to us "old" people to do while in our rocking chairs watching the sunset. I don't think so!

I never understand when kids tell me they are "bored". How is that possible? What is that old phrase - idle hands are the devil's workshop? With the temperature rising and warnings of heat waves, my granddaughter and I have taken up a new project.

Teaching my granddaughter to crochet has been a fun project. My mother (great grandma) was cleaning out her closet and found a box of yarn and crochet needles. My granddaughter and I have taken up the chubby needles and are making long chains practicing our crochet skills.

Struggling through the first few chains of single crochet stitches, she found absolute delight in how easy it was to get rid of one's less than perfect work. A quick pull and no trace of imperfections are left - plus it's cool! And just as quickly, she picked up the needle and tried again. Today she brought me several long chains that she had not only finished off but started a new one on her own.

We have a project in mind, but we are keeping it a secret until we both feel our crochet skills are up to snuff! A cool indoor project in the middle of this heat wave! That's what a wise grandma would do.

Heat Wave!

I intend to enjoy the heat wave with as much enthusiasm as I was miserable during the cold spring. I suppose this means that gardens are an iffy risk this year. The cold kept the plants from doing much more than fighting off the slugs and now the heat is wilting the few blossoms that have managed to set.

But the extreme change in weather is a challenge to little ones. We chase them around in the winter to put on a jacket or socks. Their little bodies somehow resist warm weather clothing. But what does this mean during the summer heat?

Young children and older adults are the weakest link in this chain, so take the time to protect yourself and your kids these next few days. Plan cooler activities. In Oregon, the heat of the day is around 3 to 4 pm. Plan for early morning activities and maybe a trip to the movies in the hotter part of the day. The library is a wonderful place to enjoy a cool afternoon of reading and most libraries have activities for the summer season.

Water activities can be cooling but can also be the most susceptible to the UV rays causing sunburn. Try squirt guns or water balloons. Be sure pets have fresh water and have access to shade. Plan according to the weather and your summer will be safe and sane! That's what a wise grandma would do!

And All The Little Mice Wept

Yesterday, another piece of my childhood slipped away, almost unnoticed. I can picture her little mice friends all standing with the hats she made them in their hands, with heavy hearts sighing for their dear Cinderelly. The voice of a nightingale, or rather a fairytale princess legend will be forever silent.

Ilene Woods, the voice of Disney's Cinderella passed away July 1, 2010. This fairytale princess began as a teenage radio star. As a favor, Woods made a demo recording of "A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes" and "So This Is Love". After hearing the demo, Walt Disney contacted Ilene to audition for the role of Cinderella. Even though he had already interviewed 300 singers, Disney was said to have been impressed when he heard Ilene's voice on the demo.

And the rest is history. A character comes to life, not only through the magic of the very talented and imaginative Disney animation crews, but also from a voice that is recognizable to this day as the poor cinder girl, Cinderella. Ilene said of her experience after being declared a Disney legend in 2003, "Knowing that so many years from now, when I'm gone, that children will still be hearing my voice and enjoying the movie is the biggest thrill to come out this altogether. It was wonderful and wonderful working with Walt and all of the beautiful artists."

A true classic for this grandma, her children, her grandchildren and undoubtedly great grandchildren for generations to come, Ilene Woods will forever be Cinderella making every little girl believe that a dream truly is a wish that your heart makes. "Sing Sweet Nightingale"

What's For Dinner?

It has been ages since I have posted. Life has once again happened while I was making plans. So many things have gone by the wayside, not the least of which is a trip to grocery store.

My days are long and once home, I begin to think "what's for dinner?, the common cry of the busy woman. Like Old Mother Hubbard, I fear opening the cupboard will only reveal bare shelves with little more than a can of tuna and a few spices. Lucky for me there is also a box of crackers around here somewhere. Instant dinner!

Kelly Donlea has come to the rescue with her new cookbook, 70 Meals, One Trip To The Store. No more looking into the cupboard and realizing you are missing the one ingredient you need. Also the common cry of the busy woman. Well, dry your tears and open the book. There you will find a shopping list that once compiled, your worries about what's for dinner or the missing link in the recipe will never darken your cupboard door again.

Along with shopping lists - a semi annual and weekly list, Kelly has a recipe index with 70 meals of a variety of chicken, ground beef, fish, pizza and pasta recipes to compliment any dinner table and bellies of a hungry family. The shopping list is organized into "core ingredients" with multiple uses across the many recipes. When you cut the "ingredient clutter", life in the kitchen becomes simple and delicious.

With several recipes for meatloaf or meatballs, pizza and wraps, the opportunities to raise a fork in tummy full delight are bountiful. Easy to read, 70 Meals is a great way to engage children in the making of a meal. From the trip to the grocery store to the choosing of the meal, children learn the value of nutrition, organizing and helping in the kitchen. Bringing new meaning to family time, Kelly Donlea's new cookbook is the new cry of the busy mom. Entrees, one-pot dishes, soups and side dishes there is something to please everyone and satisfy even the most rumbly belly.

Find more of Kelly Donlea's organizing tips on her web site www.organizingdinner.com. You will find her other cookbook, Cook Once, Eat Twice, along with her Blog, recipes and Dinner 911. Making mealtime fun instead of another chore - that's what a wise grandma would do.